My Deception

Take every ounce of pain
I have suffered through
Swallow it like a bitter sweet pill
And tell me what is true
And what is not
Remove every ounce of hate
I have flowing in my veins
Become larger than anything life has to offer
Until only pleasure passion and lust remain
Inject these fangs
With the venom of seduction
Remove the steel from my eyes
Until I solely become a function
Of a higher power only I relate to in my own mind
And every atom of negativity
Is eliminated so you will no longer find
Any of my weaknesses lingering deep in the caverns I once slept
And there will no longer be the bitterness which translates to hate and pain
Causing others who trusted me then wept
To hate the man who once made the shiver in pleasure
All I want to be is the reality of influence that can't be measured
In most people's common perception
And NO RIB which will finally complete
My
Deception

Something I wrote a long time ago

Cling close to me
And for the first time you will see
The challenge of true love
It's clear that you and I are meant to be
Whatever we are
And whatever we are not
Whisper your fears in my ears
Allow life to finally foil the plot
Of those who see things that really don't exist

GOD girl...how much have I missed
Your touch
Your caress
To know that you took a moment while you began to dress
To bother to be concerned that maybe you won't impress...
Me
I'm here...and so are you.
Let us both be very.....very....careful
With what we do
It's clear that whatever we feel is true
So cast both of our egos to the side
And enjoy the length and depth of this ride
Walk your sexxxy fine ass over here
Stare into my eyes as we finally begin
All
Over
Again

Trial entry

What happens when we fall in love? What happens when we stay in love? Why is it supposed to be such a big deal. I mean you know that whole feeling...the birds chirping...the love songs that just caress your ears......the bright spots that take up your whole existence. Where doest it begin and why does it ever end? What happens when you fall in love with the same person again and again? Does that mean you feel out of love with them again and again?

I still seek to find my center. I know it's here, and I have tasted a little bit of it..and it is sooooo freeing. And what about music? Why is it that I can actually...almost meditate..through music. I say almost..because clearly I am usually not living in the NOW. But I am living in another space and time that becomes so real it is my existence at that moment. There are so many things for me to work on...but for now I need to get through this trial. Robbery in the first degree. Why couldn't my first trial be something like a misdemeanor trial....or even a drug or gun case? Robbery in the first degree where an assault on a 62 year old man is captured on tape. And my guy has a conviction of an Attempted Robbery. And I am thinking that I'm going to win this case (give up the assualt for the robbery). What to do?

I have so many feelings...so many emotions......I just want to

Write
Look deep inside me and see who is behind my center
Come and travel in my world and see what happens when you enter
Into something that is not what it seems
And the reality of my life is like some people's dreams
I can do whatever I want
But there are consequences at every turn
I have memories I refuse to allow them to haunt
Me until I have no longer learned
That if I do the same thing over and over again
It is only a matter of time before the repitition begins
And I find myself in the same place
At a different time
And wondering why certain things I want
I can't call them mind
But for now I am enjoying where I am
So come in and be me for a second
Then you will understand
No Rib